If you have been following my posts, you will know that the focus has been on “out with the old, in with the new”. If you have been following the suggestions, then you will have not only a clean garage, but a lighter heart. If you did the soul-searching work, you probably landed on old soul wounds and possibly victim mentality. It is time to re-write your victim’s story.
Let’s say you had a difficult childhood, or someone emotionally wounded you. That sh*t can stick with you for life! Too often, trauma of some sort leaves a deep soul wound that takes a long time to heal. If you even go there at all. It’s necessary, if you would like to break old patterns and have a happier life.
If you have experienced severe trauma, I highly recommend seeking professional help. Even if your trauma wasn’t severe, you might be the type who prefers to work with professionals rather than doing it on your own. I am not a doctor, but I have worked through childhood issues and it is the best thing I have ever done for myself. I utilized professional help and I did an enormous amount of work on my own.
Allow the feelings. Write them down. If you want, write a nasty letter to the person who harmed you and then burn the sucker (the letter, not the person). Accept that you are human, that negative feelings are okay, and allow yourself to have them. Just don’t wallow; that’s what we are trying to get rid of.
Now step back and pretend you are Spock from Star Trek. Get all logical and look at the situation without feelings. Was your interpretation of the event beyond how you felt? If you were a child, did you maybe make up things about the event through the eyes of a child? No judgement, just facts. If this was a repeat of a previous event, are you adding an extra layer onto this event? Can you put your perceptions aside to look at the event as it really occurred? This is not to say you have made anything up; just that our perceptions can make things appear different.
Can you forgive yourself for being a participant in the event? No, you may not have consciously chosen this, but too often we are too afraid to stop what is happening. So the best thing to do is to hug yourself, forgive your younger self for being caught in the event and promise yourself that the adult-you will take care of you from now on.
Can you open yourself to the possibility that the event may have been to help your spiritual growth? Let’s say your father abandoned your family when you were a child. Your soul wound was that your father didn’t love you and it created the belief that no man would ever love or support you. All your romantic relationships were with men who were emotionally unavailable and unsupportive of you, thus reinforcing the belief that no man would ever love you. Let’s say in your last relationship, your partner had a blatant affair with another woman and it nearly wrecked you. What if this was the Universe trying to get your attention? That maybe this man did you a favor by making you feel so bad you felt compelled to do something about yourself? To finally heal your soul wound that your father didn’t love you.
Can you write yourself a new story?
Like attracts like so your belief will bring only this type of man into your life. When you change your belief to one that says You Are Lovable, then your outer world will reflect that. When you begin to love yourself, and know that you are perfect in all ways, you will shine that out like a beacon. You will attract similar people, who love themselves, and are capable of loving others.
So how does your story go?