I Showed Up

work-47200_640Have you noticed the increasing lack of empathy, courtesy and service amongst people around you? No one seems to care. No one wants to put out any effort. And there is an enormous amount of entitlement going around.

Whatever happened to good old-fashioned work and attention?

You need a service call for some equipment that isn’t working properly. If you can get someone to answer the phone, they don’t really give a sh*t about your problem. “When the guy gets out of bed, he can be at your house sometime between 10:30 am and 4:00 pm.” And then usually shows up at 4:05. If you are working or have family responsibilities, that just screws up your whole day. Especially when the guy says he doesn’t have the right part and will have to come back next week, but it might not be him ‘cause his day off is Tuesday and that’s when the part comes in.


You are in the checkout lane, waiting, because two of the clerks are having a party over their cell phones.

office-620823_640The employee that strolls in at 9:00, goes into a meeting to get their daily coffee and bagel fix, checks email at their desk, wanders around the building chatting with the other slackers, leaves for lunch, goes to the gym, comes back at 3:00 and has to leave early. Remember the “Merry Old Land of Oz” song? Those same people come in with their newly minted $200k college degree expecting the top of the salary range too.

The neighbor who thinks grass will mow itself. Or driveways are to park their car – permanently.

What is wrong with people? Are we supposed to BOW because You Showed Up?

cashier-1791106_640I can only speculate that it is because peoples’ lives have become meaningless. I’m all for technology and innovation, but it is too often used as an excuse not to do anything. Directionless, meaningless, uselessness. Translates as a Totally F*cking Boring Existence. No wonder so many people are doing drugs. We are getting dumber by the hour.

Start small. When you wake up in the morning, give yourself a goal. What one thing can I do to bring a smile to someone else? One smile will lead to another and you’ll feel so good that every day will be about being in service.

And you won’t Just Show Up.

St. Party’s Day

st-patricks-day-3217991_640I have a bit of a headache. On the “Wearin’ of the Green” day, we joined the throngs of other people to troll a neighborhood of restaurants, bars and boutiques. We started off with Mexican. Margaritas are green, you know. I had one along with chips and queso to slow it down.

We wandered. I shopped. Wandered some more and ended up in a pub with great Irish music. All Irish music is great, in case you were wondering. The pub had some drink specials, one of them being a mix of Bailey’s and Jamesons. No bigger than a shot a piece. I had two of those, sipped slowly.

We wandered some more. I shopped some more. I wasn’t all that tipsy so why the headache? I don’t drink much and maybe the shots were more powerful than I thought. Maybe it’s the mixture as people often say. Or it could be just the weather, as it’s been nice and now rain/snow is coming in this afternoon.

green-beer-2103313_640Is the alcohol to blame for my headache? I’m just not sure. There are so many varied opinions about alcohol that I don’t even know what to believe.

For instance, alcohol abuse. Shouldn’t it be called alcohol overuse? I mean, it’s not like you beat it with your fist or something. Too much drinking makes you stink. Too much makes you feel like the cat box or that you groomed yourself like a cat. Too much of anything isn’t good for you so it stands to reason that you shouldn’t overuse it.

Then there is the theory that a little bit is good for your heart. Does anyone really know what IS good for your heart? You often hear about those 90-100 year olds having their daily dose of booze as their key to living longer. I just think those people have a good attitude.

I’m very certain that I don’t know the right or wrong of alcohol. It gets people out together to have fun, relax and occasionally do something silly. Like wearing little green plastic hats. With sparkly shamrocks on their cheeks. And a T-shirt that says “Kiss Me, I’m Irish”.

None of which, I’m sure, was what Saint Patrick had in mind.

IT Is Not An Earring

earring-2591496_640Have you ever stopped wearing pierced earrings and after a time the hole grew shut? Maybe you had three or four in each ear and decided you didn’t want that many anymore. Maybe you just decided you didn’t like pierced ears after a time. Earrings are a fun and beautiful accessory that can be enjoyed.

Sex is not earring. If you don’t use IT, the hole will not grow shut. You might think that when you are in your menopause years. Your body is changing and maybe sex is not what it used to be. Our inner tissues get thinner and drier and that can make sex painful. Enough so that you would rather just quit and let the hole grow shut.

man-3221066_640Sex is enjoyable and healthful for you in many ways. If you do not move your joints the fluids surrounding them do not lubricate them properly and then you have pain. Same thing Down Below. Using IT keeps it healthier and lubricated. Plus all the brain chemicals and hormones that get generated during sex keeps you happier and healthier.

If you are experiencing a lot of pain, talk to your doctor. There are many options that can help. If you are in a relationship, SHARE your issues with your partner. It will help prevent them from thinking that you are not interested in THEM. Try different things with your partner. If penetration is too painful, try oral. Invest in a Battery Operated Boy, otherwise known as BOB. BOB can be your friend if you are not in a relationship. Just do not give up sex because it is painful.

You are still a sexy, beautiful woman. Be that! And put the earring back in.

Not My Monkeys

monkey-474147_640You know them, the people that seem to hang around your neck wanting you to fix everything for them. They’re charming, they’re funny, they are almost child-like and they have this mysterious way that convinces you to agree with what they want.

They are not your Monkeys.

If you say no or you don’t have time, they up the ante. “But you are so good at it,” and you get sucked in. If you still say no, the guilt trip comes, “you don’t care about me,” and maybe they’ll bring up an illness so you get alarmed. If you are tough enough to get past that, watch out, as their temper will rival a three-year-old’s and you will get burned.

They are not your Monkeys.animals-2025376_640

Every time you get sucked into someone else’s sh*t that you don’t have the time or the resources for, you take away time for yourself to work on what matters to you. You’ll feel tired. You’ll feel resentment. You’ll feel angry, and you might not even like that person very much.

So why do you have those Monkeys on your back?

It’s difficult to tell people No when you are a kind, helpful person. Those are really good character traits to have so don’t try to replace them with nastiness. You just need to learn how to put yourself first. After all, those Monkeys are good at putting themselves first.

Monkeys can pick their rescuers out of a crowd. They have an uncanny ability to zero in on the one – or three – people out of fifty that they can work to their advantage. Don’t be one. It is not selfish to put your needs first. It is only selfish when you do it to the exclusion of everyone else – like the Monkeys.

Practice saying no. If you don’t feel good, don’t agree to go to the grocery store for the Monkey. They have two legs and two arms. (Now I’m not including truly handicapped persons as Monkeys.) A two-year-old is not a Monkey. Well, yes they are, in a different form when they are trying to climb up the kitchen cupboards to the cookie jar on the top shelf.

Your needs are important and should always be attended to first. Not entitlements, but self-care, things that derive income, and things you are passionate about. When you are happy and fulfilled, you will have time and energy to give to others.

Just don’t give in to Monkey Business. Let them find another circus.

The Highs Are Not As High As The Lows Are Low

marijuana-2766343_640Colorado has a booming marijuana business. Tax revenues are in the billions, housing is going up everywhere, employment is active. The medical side, without the mild-altering THC, has many benefits: seizures, chemo patients and pain management to name a few. Perhaps it is the answer to the opioid crisis that has sent many desperate pain-ridden people into misery and homelessness.

I don’t like pot and have no need to lie about that. I tried it many years ago and learned that it was not for me. As an intuitive empath, I normally sense and read people’s emotions. Part of my life purpose is to assist with healing, so I automatically go into the mode of drawing out negative energy. People use pot typically to calm down, let go of vacuum-29951_1280stress and release negative emotions. When I was under the influence, I turned into a human vacuum cleaner and sucked up a lot of sh*t from people, leaving me in a depressed, anxious and crabby state. Pot is not for me.

I don’t really have an opinion of whether it is right or wrong. Apparently the medical version is highly [no pun intended] effective. However, it should not be used by children and young adults because of the effect on brain development. It is also detrimental and sometimes fatal to animals. But as with any sort of addiction, pot is a way of avoiding or covering up negative emotions. It is a temporary state that doesn’t lift a person up more than they were down.

It is high time to deal with our sh*t instead of getting high to avoid getting down.

Nothing outside of yourself is ever going to make you completely happy. Addictions or distractions come in many forms and typically cost money. They are temporary fixes for our pain. Look within before you look without and ask yourself “what is the source of my pain?” Seek professional help if it is not something you want to deal with on your own. Own your pain. Facing your pain is not as scary as you would think. Allow your body to release the chemical toxins associated with emotional pain by crying, shaking and even vomiting. This is normal. Tears will stop. Write about it in a journal. Nurture yourself with a warm bubble bath. A cup of herbal tea. As you work through your pain, you will find that you will begin to have less of a need to cover it up with distractions.

And then, your highs will be higher than the lows are low.

Uranus – It’s Always About Some A$$hole

uranus-11626_640Yep, I’m going a little astrology on you. It is not as hokey as it sounds. Think of what happens during a Full Moon, people tend to go all nutty on you.

Uranus is the planet of unexpected change and some of it might not be what you would like in your life. This planet moves through the astrological signs every 7-9 years. Prior to 2011, it was in the sign of Pisces – murky, water energy – and you will recall tsunamis. In 2011, it rolled into Aries – the sign of the Warrior – and will stay there until May 2018. Fires, anyone? Think about all the hotheaded, name-calling, angry, finger-poking that we see in the media. It is certainly a time of unexpected change.

The good thing, to call it that, is that Uranus will teach you – and push you – to be flexible, creative and maybe a bit revolutionary in your life. Uranus also rules technology so notice how the media is directing the world.

How does this affect you? You can do some research to determine how Uranus affects your sign. It would also be healthy for you to see what anger issues might be triggered in you by all the events. Look beneath the surface for the areas in your life that need healing. If a bigger stage is your calling, perhaps taking to social media – gently please, we don’t need any more name-calling battles, there is too much already – might be a way for you to reach out. (This blog was birthed October 2017.) Enough calm but determined voices can begin to heal the planet, along with yourself.

So what a$$hole do you need to vanquish?

Incidentally, Uranus will be moving into Taurus in May bringing with it some grounding, stabilizing energy.  Whew!


Amazon: Star Trek Fan Collective – Klingon2001 (DVD)
Remember Klingons?  The warrior race on Star Trek that Captain Kirk battled with and then later evolved as crew with Captain Piccard.  Seriously tough beings.  I think they are now disguised as hockey players.

The other Kling-Ons are also known to you.  Those toxic people that suck the life and energy out of you with their constant problems.  The ones they never want solved. They show up as family members: “what are WE going to do about Mom?”  WE means YOU.  And you get the excuses: “you live closer”, “I have to work” and the clincher: “you are soooo capable”.  You’ll recognize them in your friends.  The ones that call you all the time, keeping you up half the night, complaining about their husband or boyfriend, their kids, their job or whatever. And when you offer up a suggestion, their response is usually “you just don’t care about me”.  And then there is that coworker (or several), who are always SO overwhelmed yet always manage to take a day off every other week.

These people are energy vampires.  Their skill is seeking out kind, helpful souls upon whom they can pour out their problems.  Once they start, they literally sink an energy tube into you and begin draining your time, energy and sometimes money.  Got a chronic pain that won’t go away?  Does it get worse after you are in contact with a toxic person?  That’s where the tube is attached.  You have to stop the feeding frenzy.

The good news is that these energy tubes can be removed.  A wonderful, magical, metaphysical tool is using your hands as a sword.  Move your hands up and down and all around your body, envisioning them as a sword cutting away all those energy sucking tubes.  Slicing them right off.  And NO, you won’t cut off the important ones such as your connection to the Creator or the loving ones connecting you to your children or partner.  Love energy cannot be removed.  Once you have sliced and diced, take a deep breath and see how you feel.  You should feel lighter and your energy should be returning.  If you still have an ache, slice at that area until it feels released.  If you have dealt with that person for many years, those cords get very thick and take a few whacks to get rid of them.

Do not be surprised if you hear from that person in a very short period of time.  They can energetically feel that you have cut them off.  Do not answer the phone, text or email.  If possible, go for a walk, take a bath or shower, or paint the living room to keep your hands away from that device.  They can WAIT.  You need to take care of yourself.  Practice saying “No” so when they call with another demand you can say you are too busy.

And you will be, because you are going to start watching every episode of Star Trek and Boldly Go Where No One Has Gone Before. . .into your drama-free life.


Our beloved Denver Broncos are having a meltdown.  Dropped passes, fumbles, revolving quarterbacks and schemes that aren’t working.  From Super Bowl winning greatness to tough guys crying on camera and coaching staff out the door.  Such is the NFL.ice-cubes-1914351_1920

If you’ve ever had a meltdown – or a zillion of them – then I’m quite sure you understand what is happening.  Meltdowns are the product of not dealing with our sh*t.  Unmet needs, self-denial, over-hyped expectations all covered up with a stinking pile of apathy.  Until your body says: ENOUGH. And all Hell breaks loose.  Crying on camera seems pretty mild compared to the average meltdown.

Meltdowns are necessary if you hope to move on to better things.  Hopefully our Broncos see it this way too.  Your body very kindly overrides your monkey brain and takes care of business for you.  Shaking, crying, vomiting, other bodily releases is how you dump an overload of stress.  It’s called Detox.  Sure, you feel like sh*t when you are in the midst of it and then. . . whoa!. . .suddenly the world looks bright again.  Phoenix rising from the ashes.  Use your purge wisely and re-think the direction you are going.  It is the time to make serious changes.  Oh you will still have meltdowns from time-to-time, but it is normal and you will live through them.

After all, there will be another Super Bowl to win.

Authenticity Part III – Grow A Pair

It takes a great amount of courage to step into your authentic self.  Especially if this is out of your “normal” way.  Your Ego immediately kicks in.  It drags its nasty self out from behind your head and parks itself on your shoulder.  And the dialogue begins.  “What makes you think you’re so special?”  “Why do you think anyone would be interested in You or what you have to Say?”  “You aren’t capable of doing that.”

SIGH.  Don’t give in to it.  You gotta tell the b*tch to shut up, grab it off your shoulder and stick it behind your ear.  Keep going, because nothing wonderful ever happened if you let your Ego rule the show.  It is all about your happiness and not the Ego’s control.photography-2754902_1280Some things could be fulfilling a long-ago wish.  When I was a teenager, a bunch of schoolmates went around with their 35mm cameras taking photos of everything.  I wanted to be one of them, but wasn’t given the opportunity.  But now, I just bought a really nice camera and can’t wait to take it to the streets and capture real life.  My fashion shoots have also been a dream fulfilled.  My college years included modeling and a professional photo shoot, which I also didn’t get to do.  (I knew modeling wasn’t a reality – I’m 5’1″ – and okay with that.)  Still, if it is something you are meant to do your other Inner Voice will continue with a subtle, persistent nagging.  So just do it!

It also takes a great amount of courage to put yourself out on social media or in some other way in the public eye.  I don’t have a Facebook account, but there are people I follow.  I have heard of the “trolls” that hang out there and write nasty stuff.  No Sh*t!!  Trolls might be too gentle a word.  A$$-ripping T-Rexs might be more accurate.  Good grief, people, if you don’t like the site – why are you there??!

To be fair, I have not experienced any of this here.  I am very thankful to those of you who have been reading and following my posts.  You all have actually Liked them!

Being authentic and stepping out there does not require anyone’s approval or opinion, it is all about doing something that pleases your soul.  You need to ignore the negativity – it’s not about you, it’s about them.  However, when you have the support of someone it sure is easier.  My sweetie doesn’t read my ramblings, but he supports what I am doing and he has been my photographer.  We’re having fun too.

So be brave, get out there and please your soul.  And support each other.   Rock on!

Daddy Do Right

Lately we are seeing many news stories about women speaking out about sexual assault from men. In many cases, it was from men in a position of trust or “father figure”. Sexual assault, abuse or exploitation are wrong on every level and should be brought out and dealt with appropriately. We know that it has been around for centuries, but maybe now is the time for this sh*t to be resolved and healed.

I wonder if we are missing a simple key to this problem. Biologically, men are wired to procreate often in order to perpetuate the species. Too often this drive is accompanied by dominance over or violence to someone. What is causing this? Could it be that men have a deep collective soul wound that can no longer be buried? One that started with the birth of humanity? Is it possible – that because men can’t grow life and give birth – that they feel inadequate to women and are afraid of our power and so they turn to dominance and violence to feel that they have power?

Maybe men fear our love more than they fear our hate.

I think we have here a huge opportunity for healing. Men have very strong and deep emotions. Perhaps if we teach them that feeling and expressing love is powerful, that strong women are supportive and not threatening, we might lessen the need for abuse. Mothers can teach their sons to be loving, and daughters can teach their fathers that girl power is still gentle.

And maybe, just maybe, we’ll begin to see balance and equality and a lot more love in this world.