Re-Vital-Isation

Hello Friends,

It’s been awhile since I’ve actually written a blog article. Another strange year, to be sure, and I did spend some time writing and publishing my new book Dealing With Sh*t: Becoming Your Badass Self: Fry, Lorrie K: 9798746815446: Amazon.com: Books I’d be much obliged if you purchased a copy. If you like my brand of writing style, I have no doubt you will enjoy the newest in my line of “Sh*t” books. (not about poop, in case you were wondering)

Anyway, I have been quite busy. The Colorado winter was long and cold this year. In March, we had an enormous amount of snow. When you are retired, you naturally spend more time at home. Now, I don’t mind this, being a homebody, but I do like to get out and walk. Not bloody likely with 2 feet of snow and more coming. So we traded snowballs for cactus.

Colorado in March
Arizona in June

I had been feeling anxious and restless throughout the early months of the year. You could blame it on the snow and cold, or blame it on the viral insanity. I suppose those things are true, but it was more than that. I felt an urgency to leave Colorado. My lovely, beautiful, 5-year-old home in a great neighborhood with food and drink and shopping all within a 5 minute walk began to feel like a prison. I was constantly on edge with keeping up with maintenance, not that it needed it, but you have to keep things up to avoid bigger issues later on. My Sweetie was usually off working on a project, so I took care of things. I had plenty of entertainment at home, as well as an infinite amount of information to be found online. But something felt “off”. I longed for some fun. I longed for less responsibilities. I longed for warm weather. There is nothing quite as nice as a swimming pool, beach, patio, bistro or afternoon cocktail in the sunshine, providing it’s not too hot. We have friends that were already living in Arizona. We had made several visits in the past few years, but I wasn’t that excited about it at the time. Still in my stress-filled work coma and couldn’t appreciate the good points. But suddenly, it seemed the place to go.

In April, we took a road trip to Phoenix to see if we wanted to relocate. We took a few days and drove around, and decided that the Sun City/Sun City West area was the place to be. Plenty of things to do, shop, eat, drink and be merry – or my newfound slogan “getting jiggy in the desert with the old people”. We did some digging into the real estate, and a couple weeks later my Sweetie flew down for a couple of tours. He picked the house I hoped for, on a golf course with a beautiful view from 2 sides of the home. He made an offer and it was accepted. Then began the real work. If you have ever moved, you know that it is a great deal of work, stress, time and money. Thankfully, we were both retired and had the luxury of time. Add to that, the listing and selling of our then-current home. People traipsing through trying to get a good view of the home, but with moving boxes stacked everywhere. But it happened, and it afforded us the home, the move and a renewal of our new home.

We went from a 5 year-old home to one built in 1973. Very interesting. Now, I love mid-century modern so this was just right. A three-story home to a ranch, which is wonderful, to say the least. The prior owner had maintained the home quite well, and it has some very cool characteristics, which we are preserving. If you want to know anything about these homes, look up Del Webb and Sun City. Loads of storage, big windows and patio doors open to the outside – and get this – big clothes closets. Yes, really. Although, it was a little short on space for my shoes, but most places are short on space for my shoes. I believe I’ve written about them before.

It began as a beige box. Beige walls, ceiling, trim and carpet. We ripped out the carpet and installed laminate flooring. We painted everything white, except for accent walls in this happy yellow color, incidentally called “Smiley Face”. (The original Smiley Face was created in 1963 – a true mid-century modern icon.) It kind of makes me feel like I’m at a beach; my favorite place in the world. Talk about re-VITAL-isation.

Still a little unpacking and work to be done – waiting on library bookshelves

My anxiety and restlessness came from a serious need to release a lot of my responsibilities and learn to play and have fun. I wasn’t really having that in my Colorado life. Colorado is a beautiful state, and Denver is very vibrant, but it is all primarily oriented towards the outdoor life. Nothing wrong with that, I had done plenty of outdoorsy things. But, when you are older, you just aren’t feeling the need to pitch a tent, load/unload a camper, hike or any of that stuff. Not that older people CAN’T, but I and my Sweetie were true urbanites. If you know anything about Sun City/Sun City West, then you know it was designed for the over-55 crowd. I have seen more 80-somethings, who are healthy and active, in the 6 weeks I’ve been here than I ever have before. If you get bored here, you are probably dead. There are 8 rec centers, and probably as many golf courses (I’m not a golfer) in this city, with plenty to do at each. I’m loving the walking pool. Like a water-filled rat maze and you walk in a current. Great exercise in 100+ degree temps. And then there is Bell Road. If you can’t find a place to shop, eat, drink, get services of any kind, then you just haven’t left your house.

Have I said yet that I love it here? Let me count the ways. I feel as though I am beginning to blossom and really enjoy life. Sure, we’ve been very busy and tired from working on the house, but that is short-lived and will soon be done. And then it’s “party on, dudes”. I think it’s about time for an afternoon cocktail.

Thought For Today – March 25, 2021

Not everything is what it appears to be. Go within, listen to your inner guidance and pay attention to only that which resonates within you. Everything else is just a movie.

Teaser alert!: I’m working on a new book. . . more to follow.

Firewalker

I listened to this excellent video from Lorie Ladd: Facebook , where she speaks of learning to “stand in the Fire and not get burned”. What does this mean?

The Ascension energies are ramping up and moving through every aspect of life. You are being shown your inner demons, wounds, unresolved trauma, everything that has held you back from being your highest and best self. And you know what? There is no longer any place to run to and hide. No more putting this off, ignoring, denying or enacting any other coping mechanism. It is time to dig deep and heal once and for all.

It’s not easy, which is why you’ve been in denial all this time. But it will be worth it. No one can do this for you. No one can tell you how to do this. It must come from within. You can access your spiritual guides for assistance, but because of free will it is still up to you.

You may be triggered in all areas of your life. What is the common theme? Do you always feel “less than”? Work from within, not “well, this person needs to act this way”. So why do they act this way towards you? Is it because you have let them cross your boundaries? Do you let them tell you what to do? Only you are in charge of your body, mind, heart and soul. Healing yourself into assertiveness is not becoming a bully – that’s just another layer to heal.

Running away only delays the healing process and will continue to put you in situations until you do. “Same tune, different words.” It is time to face the Fire.

When It’s Dark

Last night, I listened to this awesome roundtable with Michael Jaco, Jay Campbell, Dr Christiane Northrup, Jason Shurka and Lorie Ladd. Five of my favorite Lightworkers. It is on Michael Jaco’s Youtube page. Living In Resonance: Special Valentine’s Day Roundtable – YouTube

In it, they speak about the collective Dark Night of the Soul. Something that we are all experiencing now as we shift the entire collective energy into a higher frequency. A monumental task, one which comes with no instruction manual.

What is the Dark Night of the Soul? It’s a point in time when you have hit rock bottom, don’t know what to do, can’t cope and may even think that life isn’t worth living. Yeah, some serious shit. However, if that moment puts you in imminent danger then get yourself to safety whether it be person, place or thing. Scream loudly for help.

If not imminent danger, then you might just be facedown in the muck wondering how you got there. Circumstances, poor choices, a lot of poor choices. . .but it’s hard to breathe. You can’t see any way out. What to do? ROLL OVER. Take a deep breath, because how can you think when you are hyperventilating? In other words give yourself a break. Roll over, listen to the sound of your in and out breath, feel your heartbeat and allow yourself to release the emotions. You may even need to pull your head out of your butt. Get out of your head. You do that by feeling what’s going on in your body. Then look up. Maybe you are in the bottom of the well, lying in shit, but if you got in there then there is a way back out. When you look up, you might see that opening. There might even be a bright, shining light streaming in. That is the light of hope. When you focus on hope, then you open up to possibilities and that is where the miracles live.

And you live through it.

These Dark Night of the Soul moments are points of transformation. Not only do they build our inner resiliency, but they teach us to trust ourselves and force us to honor our Soul’s desires. Maybe you had been experiencing little testing points or incidences that didn’t get your attention. Then the shitstorm comes and knocks you off your feet. But only for a little while. You emerge out of that barrel of despair a newer, stronger better version of you. Just don’t drink the barrel dry before you get out.

I Want It Now!

This video message may or may not resonate with you. If not, just close it before you get heartburn. It is a very thought provoking message by Juan O Savin: Juan O’Savin – A summary of what is going on. – YouTube

If you know who Juan is, then you will understand the message. If not, it is about the Plan of current events. Again, this may not be for you.

The message is simple: have patience and trust God’s Plan. This past week had many folks upset, because certain actions were expected. It wasn’t the right time. Yes, we want it now, but you want everything to be completely finished so we don’t have to ever go through this again. 2020 Deja vu? HORRORS!! Think about the people who have planned this and have dodged bullets and bombs for the last 20-60 years. You can damn well bet they want this over and done. Maybe a month’s long vacation in Tahiti or someplace after they have banished evil for good.

We are ready to move forward into the New Earth. We want to clean up the mess and begin to rebuild society into a marvelous, abundant, happy and peaceful place. I can’t imagine anyone not wanting that. It is our transformation into the 5th Dimension. Notice that I wrote “begin to rebuild” and “transformation”. This is not a “won and done” situation. Like anything it is a process, and part of that process is cleaning up the shitpile inside of you. “You can’t take it with you” is very appropriate.

God and all the spiritual beings are helping you with this process. How many triggers have you encountered in this past year? Have you experienced the “Dark Night of the Soul”? Maybe more than once? Maybe you encountered health issues. Maybe around safety and security needs. Maybe your relationships became strained or even separated. Instead of going into victim mode, give thanks that your soul wounds are coming up for healing.

And maybe you thought you had already healed your “stuff”.

Think of your wounding as layers of an onion. The original trauma occurs and then as you grow older, layers build up each time you are in a situation that mimics the original wound. So healing happens in layers as you keep peeling back each one. I, too, thought I had “fixed” everything, but my relationship just hit a boil.

I have been in a romantic relationship for 13 years. I have been previously married. I am an Empath, and like most of us, put my needs last and attract narcissistic partners. Empaths often have childhood trauma of abandonment and unworthiness. I hate conflict and when things get bad, I leave. Early on in this relationship, there were some commitment issues but I thought they had been worked out. I overlooked some of the flaws, because overall, we got along well and had fun together. I shoved down my resentments of lack of support, and in typical Empath fashion, overcompensated by giving too much. I taught myself how to back down on that. I retired last year and he picked up more of the financial support, so I thought that was okay. I took on more of the household responsibilities thinking that evened it out. And then April arrived with all the “you know what” Thing. Just so you know, I am a researcher and truth seeker. I have been like that since I was a child. Being newly retired, I had ample time to dig in. And I did. And I learned far MORE than I ever could have imagined. Some of it horrific and almost unbelievable. (Cognitive Dissonance) And then I determined that I like Orange better than I liked Blue, but my partner absolutely hates Orange. I think you know what I am talking about.

I am not the type of person to push my opinions or beliefs on others. I will “test the waters” and see where you might stand on an issue. If it doesn’t resonate, I’ll let it go. No worries. If it does, then I’ll talk to you about it and share the information I have discovered. So I did that with him. That’s what you do in a relationship. Normally, if it doesn’t resonate you’ll get “I don’t agree, but I love you anyway”. Not so in this case. Name calling and shaming was what I got in return, to the point of being told that I was insane and that my opinion was wrong. He has distanced himself from me (within our house), and even wrote an email listing my supposed insane beliefs.

And that was my wake-up call from God. We all know that opinions are like a$$holes and sometimes they both stink. But they are just personal opinions and we have the right to have them, with the only exception of those that would cause deliberate harm to someone or self. Other than that, NO ONE gets to tell you what to think. I am not a parrot. This was a wake-up call to teach me to stop giving my inner being, my worth, my validation to someone else. That I am a Divine, Sovereign Child of God. That I am deserving of all of God’s gifts. That I have the right to be treated respectfully, with honor, and be in a supportive, loving, balanced relationship. That all my life I have attracted little-boy men who would have temper tantrums if I didn’t give in. Why? Because I never learned to love the little girl within me. That because she was unwanted, and had to serve penance in the form of not being a burden to them and letting them have what they missed out on. (as my mother so often reminded me)

W.T.F. I thought I had worked through all that. I did the inner child therapy and learned how to nurture myself. But what I have just realized is that – while all good – it was just another mechanism of self-sufficiency so someone else didn’t have to support my inner child. WOW. As I said, healing comes in many layers. So my spirit guides pretty much had to shove me to the wall and make me face my “teacher” in order for me to learn how to teach others how to treat me. So I have been doing a lot of praying and asking for guidance on this. I have to continuously fight my behavior pattern of leaving the situation as They have told me I’ll just keep going through this pattern until I stop and face it. (Read about dealing with narcissistic people for more info.)

Now he’s not a bad man, but he does have some level of narcissistic traits, and I have enabled him to run wild with that. Think eight-year old spoiled brat. I never had children so I lack the necessary skills of preventing this behavior. However, it’s never too late to learn.

So the point of this very soul-baring message is don’t ignore your triggers. They are God’s gift to help you see the Divine within you. You don’t need to carry your soul wounds around with you anymore. You are totally and completely worthy and deserving of everything. Welcome to the Ascension.

Focus!!

Right now, it is very important to FOCUS on what you WANT in your life. Ignore the fear porn going on around you. Put your attention and your thoughts into creating POSITIVE things in your life. Want to stay healthy? Focus on that. Need a job or money? Focus on what that looks like. Good relationships? Put your thoughts into action.

Watching external events is like being stuck in The Matrix. Channel your inner Neo and step out of it by putting your attention into positive action.

You’ve got this!

The Pressure Is Building

Today is December 14th and the Solar Eclipse. The energies today feel like they are pressing down upon us, sort of like squeezing a boil. (I know, gross.) Anger and frustration might be rubbing on your nerves. Breathe. Take as many quiet breaks as you can. We’ll get through this.

Look Within

The lockdowns of 2020 have forced us away from friends and family. We’ve been muzzled and distanced to prevent conversations and physical touch. Many of you are alone. It’s heartbreaking and unnecessary. It might be necessary, but not in the way you think.

When I am disturbed by something, I search within to see both sides of the issue. I think the mass separation was to assist every being into looking within themselves for what they need, be it faith, truth, resilience, creativity, healing or whatever. The answers are always within you and never outside of you.

I have spoken often of the Great Awakening, humanities shift into a better way of living. That of heart-based and service to others. The release of greed, corruption, poverty, evil, egomania and other negative behaviors. A time that has been foretold and coincides with the Conjunction of Jupiter and Saturn on December 21st. Although no one really knows, it is projected that we will experience a great burst of energetic frequency that jumpstarts our path to higher living. I don’t view this as frightening or that a bunch of people will be struck down. Rather a lifting us out of heavy, negative energy. Please, God, make it quick.

What is important about the forced aloneness of 2020 is our inner healing work. Our frightened Inner Child has been screaming and having meltdowns – exactly what we need to realize what is triggering us. What has activated your tantrums this year – relationships, money, work, housing, the list is long? The repetition of the issues indicates the area(s) of your life that you need to heal. Do you want to keep reliving your crap over and over like a bad movie – or do you want to resolve it and move forward into the New Earth? Your issues may be related to the collective. Maybe it’s a family legacy or maybe just a neighborhood issue. Every step in your healing clears those connections and in all directions in time.

I know my personal pattern is with romantic relationships. I have always attracted emotionally unavailable partners with narcissistic tendencies. Ouch. Yes, I realize this and know that I am over-giving until the point of saturation and then my coping behavior is to ditch the relationship and run. Only to repeat the pattern. Admitting this is the first step to healing. Over the past month, my inner work has revealed to me a similarity in the women of my family. Out-of-wedlock or unwanted pregnancies and then lack of support by the fathers was a common theme. I was the result of this and chose not to have children for fear of perpetuating poor parenting. The root issue for me and the other women of my family is lack of self-worth. That our value to men was what we could do for them or what was between our legs. It may sound as though I hate men. I don’t. Like attracts like, so they too must have experienced patterns in their lives that taught them to be unavailable or unworthy of love. I may have attracted my partners in order to affect their healing too. Whether that happened, I don’t know and it’s not for me to know. Only my wounds are my responsibility.

So how does one begin the healing journey? First, name the trauma. Acknowledge that you experienced it in order to grow your soul and learn how to love yourself. Second, feel the feelings. Stuffing down pain and resentment just keeps it locked into your cellular structure, and it will keep erupting until you do. Connect with your Inner Child. Ask what It needs. Apologize for not honoring those needs, but that – you as the adult – will take care of and provide everything. Accept that your parents were incapable of providing for you, but forgive them for their own wounds. Nurture your Inner Child. Look at your family history and see if there is a similar pattern. Grieve for the wounding of all. Forgive them for not honoring their needs. These actions will help shift the negative energies and transmute them.

Begin to cultivate the Divine within you. Absolutely know that Divine Creator would not make someone flawed, only someone strong and capable of great learning and experiencing. You are a Divine Child of God. You are absolutely worthy of love, abundance, prosperity, peace, happiness and every other good thing you can imagine. It is all there waiting for you as YOUR DIVINE RIGHT. You have only been led to believe you are unworthy. When you can acknowledge all that is within you, you will look within for what you need. When you can act as if it is yours, you will see it manifest into your physical reality. This is all coming to each and every Divine Soul on Earth so it is important to release whatever holds you back from living a beautiful life. Take your alone time and do the inner work. I promise you it will worth it.

The Last Jedi

yoda-1091030_1920I haven’t blogged much lately. I’m not feeling inspired, but maybe it’s just because the energetic field is a bit choppy. I feel like the Last Jedi, getting bounced around in my starfighter, dodging torpedoes, and the nearest LZ is through a minefield. I think you get the idea, even if you aren’t a Star Wars fan.

I’m an Empath and I can’t shut it off. An Empath is a highly intuitive person who can sense and feel all the emotional and energetic frequency around them. An Empath can also be a Healer and naturally transmutes the frequency from low to high. Sort of a human vacuum cleaner. Normally, this is a good thing and has served me well through my life. The situation now is not normal and I’m bouncing around. I sleep 9-10 hours a night. I don’t need to go into any details about current events, but from an Empath’s view the energy goes from high to low with very little in-between. Before I go into that energy, I would like to explain how you can calm your now moment.

You must connect with your heart center. This is your solar plexus, the area where your heart and gut meet up. Think about times when you have had a “gut reaction”. Pay attention to this. If you are given information that causes an emotional reaction, pull that into your solar plexus.  How does it feel? Sick, uneasy, peaceful or happy? This is how you determine your “truth” about the information. Just because someone tells you something, does not mean it is true. You need to learn how to discern what is or isn’t true through your internal guidance system. You can also seek guidance from your spiritual connections: yours, directly to Spirit, not another person’s guidance to you. With current events running rampant with inconsistent information, you must learn to rely on yourself unless you want to get stuck in a quagmire of low energy that will wear you down.

The collective low energy vibrates in fear and anger. I have often said that “ignorance breeds fear”. Whether you want to or not, it is important to do a bit of research into what is making you afraid. Are you being told something and you are scared? Use your solar plexus to determine why you are afraid. Not dealing with fear can rupture into anger. You might project this upon someone who does not deserve your outburst. I sense a great deal of the fear-based energy when I am out in public. Part of transmuting the energy means I have to pull it through my physical body, and it moves through as anger. Yes, ick.

There is also a great deal of old grief in the collective. Many old patterns are rising to the surface to be healed. Much of this comes from the degraded feminine. Abuses, betrayals, submission, suppression, to name a few. To all the Men who are reading this article, I am not picking on you nor am I angry with you. If anything, I am angry for you because these patterns were established many centuries ago and you might not even know that this is happening. It’s the mission of both sides to unite in equal and loving ways. Children are also suffering from collective wounding. This is activating our Inner Child, and might be responsible for the many meltdowns we are witnessing in adults. So, yes, I am a little busy and a little tired. Rest assured, I am up to the task as I have much support from the spiritual realm.

The higher frequency in the collective is such that I have never felt before. It vibrates so pure, so bright, that the moment I tap into it all the yuck I have absorbed is dissipated. I am filled with a sense of peace and an absolute knowingness that everything is working out for the highest and best good and we have nothing to fear. The Universe has our backs and Divine Creator has everything under control. There is more energy in the high frequency range than there is in the low range, and it is gaining more ground each and every day. It only feels as though there is more low energy, simply because it is dense. Kind of like fog, which hangs close to the ground and blocks out the sun.

I hope this message helps you and maybe lifts your spirit a little higher. What happens when there is fog? There might be rain, or storms, but what comes after? A Rainbow, a beacon of light from Divine Creator to remind you that ALL IS WELL and you are never alone.