Me, My Selfie, and I

OMG, I can’t believe how good my hair looks today. I should’ve worn different earrings, they don’t really match my dress. My lipstick looks off. And. . . HHOOONNNKKKK!!!! Well sh*t, another double caramel macchiato ruined.

Didn’t your mother tell you to look both ways before you cross the street? To watch where you were going?

christmas-1871085_640The Selfie Obsession is overtaking the world. Preoccupation with looks, clothing, jewelry and location-location-location has nearly gotten many people injured or killed.

I remember as a teenager and young adult being overly concerned with how I looked. I believe that’s quite normal as you are developing a sense of who you are and who you want to be. Much of that includes how you appear to others. It might have been hours in front of the mirror, making sure every hair strand was where it was supposed to be and your makeup was perfect. Then a pile of discarded clothes as you picked the perfect outfit. I began sewing at a young age so I could have choices that I liked.

As you get older, you have less time to fuss and begin to develop an acceptance. Sometimes you would look in the mirror and think “f*ck” and go anyway. Those moments weren’t always the best choice when you figured out later in the day that white underwear wasn’t necessarily the right choice to wear under white pants.

mirror-1138098_640Since the creation of those magical cell phone cameras, preoccupation with appearance has morphed into obsessive levels. I’m not sure I understand it since I think I have taken one selfie in my life and promptly deleted it. I’m not that excited about close-up photos. I think selfies have gone way beyond checking your appearance or sharing a moment with friends. I heard on the news that it has now been termed “Selfitis”.IMG_0195

Let’s examine that word. “Self” meaning your essential being. “-itis” as related to inflammatory diseases. So does that mean you are an inflamed being? Are you a disease that needs to be treated? With what? Your cell phone camera?! I suppose it’s better than some drug. But why would you think there is something wrong with you? I’ve read that many people have such anxiety about how they look that they feel compelled to take a selfie. Don’t you know you are a beautiful human being?

Put your phone down, give yourself a big hug and smile. . .at everyone around you. They’ll smile back and then you won’t need a device to validate your loveliness.

The Men In My Closet

I know that sounds kinky. It’s not. Not even remotely. Get your mind out of the gutter.

I confess I have an attachment to fashion labels. Yes, shallow and easily swayed by a name. There is quite a crowd in my closet and I love them all. Tommy, Louis, Christian, Brian, Marc, Manolo, Franco, Michael and some I’m probably forgetting. Sorry guys. There are women there too – Kate, Cynthia, Miucci and Anna. But it seems that men are really good at creating beautiful things for women, especially shoes. I am thankful for this.

Why do women need Men In Their Closet? Yes, we know we have fourteen pairs of black shoes. Yes, we wear them all. It’s fun and it makes us feel good. When I put on a favorite outfit, I feel like I’m getting an upgrade. I smile. I stand taller. I start my day on happy

feet. A great outfit can actually turn a sh*tty day into something tolerable. Sure I look in the mirror, but why not? If. It. Makes. Me. Feel. Good. It. Is. A. Good. Thing. And if I feel good and am happy, then it radiates out to everyone around me and they feel good. Bonus!

Let’s hear it for the Boys!

You Are Not A Samsonite

LouvreI am sure we have all seen someone who has spent too much time in the sun. Their skin has that rich, copper-brown color, but upon closer look appears thick and leathery looking. And decidedly unhealthy too. I remember when I was a kid, my aunt would coat herself head to foot in baby oil, put on a swimsuit and lay on a blanket in the backyard for hours. Then days later, I would help her peel off that sunburn.


Time, thinner atmosphere (yes, global warming!), pollution, stress, too many carbs, too little sleep, and whatever else you have encountered has taken a toll on your skin. But like the tires on our cars, aging will wear down the surface of the skin. Nothing ages a woman more than her skin. However, it is never too late to baby it.Vatican

There are hundreds, if not thousands, of products on the market for your skin. Face, body, feet, hands. You do not need to spend a fortune to get results. Cleanse and moisturize at the very least. The very act of washing your face is relaxing and comforting. Rubbing something creamy into your skin is self-soothing. Especially if you crawl into bed right after. Mmmm, yawn.
CuracaoSymbolically, skin is our barrier to the world. We absorb toxins on a daily basis, from our environment to those crabby, draining people. No wonder sometimes we do not look our best. Bathing gets rid of those toxins. You can even imagine all that yuck going down the drain, including those toxic people. And then when you smooth in some nice body lotion think of it as a symbolic act of putting on a protective layer to keep that yuck out. Practicing daily skin care is more than just rejuvenating the outside.London

Sometimes that yuck sticks around. Whether it is from too much sun or holding onto other people’s crap, it can fester. Rashes, skin diseases, even skin cancer. Along with going to the doctor for treatment, take a look inside and listen to what is irritating you. You will speed your treatment along if you work on your inner yuck.


Besides, you want to use that other Samsonite to go to Paris in the spring.

We Are Still Playing Barbie

08501960_01[1]Botox, collagen, fillers. Hair color, hair bleach, hair extensions. Waxing, tweezing, threading, plucking. Liposuction, face lifts, breast implants, ass lifts. (Ass lifts?!) It is a lot of work and expense being female.

I blame it on Barbie. Big boobs, tiny waist and those feet. Who has feet shaped like that anyway? It is really not Barbie’s fault. The shape of women has been something to fuss over for centuries.

I’m not against any cosmetic enhancements, only the overdoing of them. I have had my own share of treatments. And I did them because I wanted to feel better about myself, and they did just that. That should be the only reason you do these things – for You and You alone. Oh sure, we like having our friends and family tell us how great we look, but never, never, never should you invest the time or money in cosmetic enhancements just because someone else said you Needed it. If they cannot love you just as you are then maybe you do not need them in your life. However, it is worth looking at the core of this.

We too often attract people in our life who act as mirrors of our inner pain. If you consistently encounter people who do not love and care for you just as you are, then you might want to ask yourself if You love You. All the cosmetic enhancements in the world are not going to make you look better if you do not love yourself. Love your Sh*t and then your outer self will match your inner self and you might not need that boob job. Go get a massage instead. You’ll feel great and you won’t have to buy a bunch of new bras.